It's AAAALIIIVE!!!!

It’s alive! I’m back!

Quitting is not apart of my vocabulary but breaks are necessary to grow within oneself and explore new things. On my mini excursion away from the good ol’ keyboard I have learned (or even relearned) many things about myself.  On the way I learned a few things that solidified the bigger plan I have for myself.  All of it came together after taking a needed trip back to my hometown. Let me tell you... I feel like a weight has been lifted from my shoulders from that experience. I can breathe and just focus on what’s forward.

After arriving back “home” it became ever so apparent that this last year was all about one thing… Running.

 As a person you can only deny things for so long when they’re right in front of your face.

Running from past relationships.

Running from burnt bridges.

Running from sort of bold business/career decisions.

Running from slightly sour personal decisions.

Some would think you’d tire after a month or so... But I tend to be one stubborn redhead.

Don’t get me wrong. I’m not saying my decision to uproot and move thousands of miles away was all fueled by running from my demons.  It was not. I do have to admit they were a great instigator. 

Moving out west has always apart of the agenda but there really had never been a definite time that it was going to take place.

After a car accident (which wasn’t my fault) that turned everything in my life upside down.. Financially, physically, and mentally. I even found it seeping into my work life by creating an underlining net of anxiety. Then everything came at once….

Having to postpone my education.

A dream turning out to be a dark pit of doom.

Losing close friends after broken friendships over gray areas.

Financial ruin.

Last but not least emotional baggage from relationships entering then exiting my life.

BLAH.. BLAH.. BLAAAH…

I actually could go on because there is plenty more. I’m not here to bitch. I’m here to give you just a small taste of what happened to me in a less than a year span to make me finally pack up and jet a year ago!

Well… Pack up and drive a tiny little Sunfire extremely far away.

Demons were definitely the instigator. 

             My motivation hasn't ever be stronger and my mind hasn't been so clearer since the weight has been lifted.

In all honestly… I should’ve went back sooner. After going back and confronting everything or even just being reminded of them gave me closure. No wonder why only few of the thing that I set out to do in this last year got accomplished. I was never a hundred percent driving forward. There was always a part of me driving back. Mentally I never made it to the west coast only a part of mind and heart, body and clothes made it there. That’s crazy to think this way. I subconsciously stunted my growth. How can you do that for so long without even thinking of it? It only took about $500 and 12 hours of flying round trip. Welp. Detonation self averted.

BACK TO LIVING POSITIVE! ;D

             

          Ps! A lot is happening and going into motion in a matter of days of arriving back to the west coast! I’ll keep you updated. Except great things in the near future! ;p